I don’t like forwards much; they’re wicked and misleading. I happen to like opening my inbox and seeing that people I like oh-so-very-much have sent me mail … but then I look at the title and realize it’s just another blasted forward.

Forwards are the lazy man’s email. They serve as a way of saying, ‘Hey I thought of you … But I don’t really have anything to say so I’m sending someone else’s words instead of coming up with my own And to top it off I’m going to send this same e-mail to half a dozen other people as well. To make matters worse if you don’t send this back my way it just shows what a lousy friend/relative/acquaintance you truly are.’

Of course there are exceptions. I will tolerate forwards from my grandmother. She’s my grandmother, which makes her privileged. Seester may also send me forward type things, but that’s only because hers aren’t typical at all and half the time they’re actually attachments that happen to be insane in the best way.

My mom on the other hand gets to do no such thing … unless they happen to be author-trackers.This is her only exception. If she wants to send me some other kind of forward which she thinks is clever or original she really should ask, because 9.5 times out of 10 she’s wrong. I’ve told her this before, but she either doesn’t listen or doesn’t understand, which is why I’m posting here just to let her know. She one of the five people who read my nonsense almost daily and I figure maybe if I put it in print, and there are witnesses, some changes will be made.

If changes aren’t made, I may have to do something dramatic … and we can’t be having with that.

All other people who send me forwards can simply go hang.